Sunrise, Sunset

Wow. That's pretty much all I can say about the last two weeks. It has literally been the hardest, most exhausting, most emotional last two weeks I have ever had. And my baby is 3 MONTHS old today!! Not only was going back to work emotionally toiling, but to also throw in moving 40 minutes away and commuting back and forth now just puts another layer on everything. I have never known this level of exhaustion. Last week was Kaitling first week in daycare, and my first week back. It was hard, but she did so good with Sheila. I think the hardest thing about it was I would get her right when she would start her "witching" hour where she would just cry for 45 minutes and there was nothing I could do to soothe her. She did this when I was home with her, too. I think that because she has never really slept much during the day, except for a couple of catnaps here and there, she is just exhausted by 5:00 and doesn't know what to do with herself except cry. But I still get to do her bedtime routine, which is still my favorite time with her. I give her a bath, and change her into her jammies, and try to read to her (depending on her mood), give her a bottle and put her down. It's so nice to have a good hour of interrupted time with her.
Then, last Friday I got home from work, and immediately started putting things in boxes and trying to get ready for the big move the next day. Saturday we woke up bright and early and I took her over to my mom's for the day (which ended in her first overnight sleepover without mommy and daddy) - which was the HARDEST of all. Not only did I feel like I had no time with her during the week, but I had to give her up on Saturday, too! Blah! Saturday we did all the moving we possibly could, and got to our new place around 10:00 pm or so and finally got our bed set-up around 1:00 am and crashed out. Sunday we woke up and were at it again - drove up to Santa Barbara to pack one last load, go get the babe, and then have lunch with some church friends since we didn't make it to the service in the morning. When we got back to the house, my only goal was to get the bare essentials unpacked for the next week, which i only kinda sorta did. So, this last week we have been in boxes, Kaitlin has been in daycare for the second week, I have been commuting 40 minutes back and forth every day, and working....phew!!! Oh - and to top it off, our new washer doesn't work. We figured that out on Tuesday when I went to do a MUST load of laundry and the water didn't turn off, which resulted in a flooded kitchen...awesome...a whole nother layer to add to the craziness. Yeah - I won't tell you what I've been wearing this week at work. I see my co-workers looking at me like, "wow - you must of had a rough night last night" to which I only want to reply, "you have NO idea". My baby, who was doing so awesome sleeping through the night all of a sudden decided she didn't want to do that anymore and was waking up every couple of hours. I am sure that most of it is because of all of the changes (which makes me feel like a horrible mother), but I keep telling myself that it will all be worth it in the end. She will have a bigger house to play in, with a yard to run around in during the summer, and opportunities that we would not be able to afford if I wasn't working. This life will be better for her soon, and we will be able to reap the benefits.
The commute - people keep asking me how the commute is, and looking at me as if the commute is this awful, horrible thing I have to do. But you know what? I LOVE the commute. It is my ONLY down time during the day where I can just turn off my brain and relax. I also have one of the most goreous commutes in the country I am pretty much convinced of (101 Ventura freeway where most of it is beautiful ocean, and the other part is the beautiful valley with the mountains in the background). I leave for work right as the sun is rising and get to see it over the water as I am coming into town, and come home right as the sun is setting over the water. Who else can say that they get to see the sunrise and sunset on the beach everyday?! But as it also tells me, that the sun will rise and the sun will set and everything WILL be okay.